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FEEDBACK:

Upper right panel – Needs to be moved to the left. (Guess some pages might have slipped past the radar during the Great Flip, eh?)

Bottom half of page – Something I’ve noticed for a bit now, but you do tend to use borders a little too strictly in these early pages. Not sure why Kanna is the only figure breaking through the bottom border of the panel, but I assume this is meant to indicate she’s in the foreground?

Oh, and I’m somewhat surprised she’s using “dear Lord” so casually here, given what has already been established in the comments about her faith. 😕 I could just be nitpicking, though.

COMMENTARY:

Yep, some Mood Whiplash going on here, but it made me smile nonetheless.

>”I’m gonna hug you, and love you, and squeeze you into itty bitty pieces!”

And call him George! (yes it’s a trope)

CORRECTION:

>She says “Good Lord” later, but for her, it’s the context. Like she’s talking to “Lord” (“Lord give me the strength”) XD
(from Act 1 Page 11)

>I’m somewhat surprised she’s using “dear Lord” so casually here
(from…this page 😅)

Oh, uh, this was the scene you meant, right? Whoops. I walk back my previous statement.

Rt Panel: Ah! Yes, indeed, that was missed!

Borders: Good point. I tried to play with them for variety, but I think just having borders for the top part, then extending all the bottom would look better.

Kanna pop out: just popped her out since she’s giving more of an aside/4th wall break, while the main part remained in the border. That was why I had a bottom border to begin with. I may play with that later.

I’m glad you smiled and got the reference XD Tiny Toons Elmyra says this (or variations of it), but yeah, I thought it would take a bit of the seriousness out of the scene. True on the whiplash, though.

A little extra babble

(I’m sure if you’re a tropester, you already know this came from Loony Toons, also. Well, I actually think it’s a reference to Of Mice and Men…which yeah, Loony Toons was often unnecessarily cruel—watching that as an adult, having read the book, makes it a bit more…obvious. Thankfully, I think most people don’t know where they got it from, and the updated version of Elmyra is fairly divorced from that).

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